How to Deal With Tough Things

Happy Easter to you! I hope that you get to get outside and get a little sunshine and fresh air. Stay safe, of course! 

One of the best things I have found by living abroad is that I have a newfound sense of courage of how to deal with tough things.  I remember when Lucas and I first moved here, that we couldn’t get internet without having a bank account, and we couldn’t get a bank account without having a visa. Our visa appointment wasn’t for 3 months because the office was backed up. We really ran into quite the vicious cycle (The Germans have a better word: Teufelskreis which translates to devil’s circle).. We ended up hopping from cafe to cafe down the main street, buying a little treat just so we could borrow some free WiFi. We would only go to cafes that had free Wifi. 

In the end, we decided to call my 2018 host mother, Suzanne, in Berlin. She definitely had a bank account, and we asked her to vouch for us so that we could get our own internet. Thank goodness she did that, otherwise I have no idea how we would have gotten out of that mess. 

After this and many other run-ins with German policy, such as supposedly not being able to get into the university for my Master’s program for having missed the deadline to sign up (I didn’t miss the deadline, it was all a misunderstanding) I learned that by pushing through and continuously contacting people and working with them, that I finally got my problems solved. 

Lesson: When you find yourself in a problem, keep pushing, any way you can. Be resilient.

It’s kind of funny how ironic this post is at this time. Just this last week I was thinking about how this is probably one of the most important skills I have gotten out of this experience of living in Germany: learning how to deal with things when they get difficult.  

Ironically, after I had thought about this, I decided it was time to research how I could get my Jeep that I purchased here back to the U.S. After spending countless hours researching, I am realizing that it is basically impossible. It can be done, but only if there are US crash tests done on a similar vehicle, which I do not know if these exist.

I also need to find someone to convert the engine to something the US EPA would agree with. Additionally, I need a weight system in the passenger seat, to detect if the passenger is of an age/weight that they may ride in the passenger seat. 

Those are a lot of hurdles to overcome. After emailing everyone who could potentially help me, none of them really want to work with me, and tell me it is impossible. It isn’t impossible, it will just cost a lot, and I am not sure if it is really worth it. I would love to keep my Jeep with me, because I get attached to vehicles. It is one of my weaknesses. 

I have spent the last few days feeling upset and miserable, and that I had no power to do anything (ideally the opposite of what I was feeling last week- that I could handle challenges). 

In the meantime, I decided that I would deal with this by putting my energy into something else. 

I have always been inspired by people who do the Ironman triathlon, and decided that I wanted to try it, too, probably when I was a kid. Last year, I became more serious by looking up training programs and other resources. Deciding is the easy part, I have found out, and actually doing the work is not.

Now that we are on quarantine, it is also the perfect time for me to start training. I can’t go swimming because the pools are closed, but I can certainly get my biking and running conditioning up.

It was my goal to bike and run each day of this quarantine. So far, I have only done that a few days. It seems that we do one activity a day, instead of doubling them up like I would like. 

But through this, I am realizing that my way of dealing with tough things doesn’t have to be to keep contacting people to try to help me. Sometimes it is better to wait things out and divert your energy to something else. In this case, I am picking exercise, because I love the feeling I get when I push myself to do hard physical things. It gives me a feeling of satisfaction that keeps me sane. I feel like exercise is my key to sanity. Then I can come back with a fresh perspective.

Lesson: When you feel like giving up, look for something to divert your energy into, that will also make you feel strong. This can be a hobby like knitting (I am also a fan), or photography, running, hiking… there are so many other great hobbies. Use them as a chance to get away from problems and make you feel successful. 

What do you do when you find yourself in a big problem? Do you have any tips for fellow readers?

“CLIMBING K2 OR FLOATING THE GRAND CANYON IN AN INNER TUBE. THERE ARE SOME THINGS ONE WOULD RATHER HAVE DONE THAN DO.” – EDWARD ABBEY

Some of my readers wanted me to show some pictures of my cats, and I thought this would be the PURRfect opportunity.